Jackson's Confessions
My name is Jackson. There's nothing much to know about me, there isn't much information to give, but my therapist says that confessing all of my thoughts and feelings can cleanse my mind. I don't believe him, but it's worth a shot. ENTRY #1: I've been diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression since I was 11. But have I told anybody? No. I'm scared of what they could think about me. I don't want them to think I'm crazy. I'm not crazy, I promise. ENTRY #2: When I was in 1st grade, I was the one that put a tac on my teacher's seat. The blame wasn't put on me, it was blamed on the last person who used them. Some girl named Stacy. ENTRY #3: I like to make up people when I talk about my school days. To be honest, I never had any friends, but I don't want them to think that. I'm not lonely. ENTRY #4: When I sleep, I always hear weird noises. Sometimes scratching, sometimes footsteps. My mom always tells me that it's just in my head. That's the worst part. ENTRY #5: Sometimes I think about killing people when they make me angry. But I never have. Never have. ENTRY #6: Every time I walk when it's dark out, I always sense someone following me. I turn around but it's never there. It never goes away. Never goes away. ENTRY #7: I hurt someone today. Not mentally, but physically. I was in an elevator and they wouldn't stop talking to me. It got on my nerves so I took action. I thank my dad for teaching me to take initiative. Thank you, dad. ENTRY #8: I've thought about harming people, killing people, doing terrible things to them. When they cloud my thoughts, I just let them storm like a hurricane. That's when they go away. ENTRY #9: My therapist says that I have problems voicing my thoughts or opinions. Who is he to judge me? He makes me angry. Very angry. ENTRY #10: I think I punched another person today. Honestly, I don't quite remember, but if I did, it felt good. Why? I don't know. He just made me want to punch him. ENTRY #11: Me and my mom got into an argument. She says I need to move out. But I don't want to. She can't make me. She can't make me. I want to hit her. ENTRY #12: I woke up this morning and my mom was gone. Nowhere to be found. I'm waiting for her to come back. Maybe she's at the store. ENTRY #13: My mom still isn't here. I've been waiting, and waiting. I want to go somewhere, but she might come back and think I went missing. For now, I'll just stay ENTRY #14: Today I decided to walk around the neighbourhood, to soothe my mind from wondering where my mom is. ENTRY #15: This terrible stench has been fogging up the house, I want to check the basement but there's so much stuff down there. ENTRY #16: The stench has gotten worse. I can hardly stay in the house. Maybe I should check it, but I'm still waiting for my mom. She can clean it ENTRY #17: I decided to go to the basement to see what was stinking up the house. I finally found my mom. I love being able to cuddle with her. But she felt awfully cold. Awfully cold. ENTRY #18: My therapist has gone missing, also. I checked into the office with my mom in the car, and she decided to stay behind. When I entered the building, they said that my therapist was nowhere to be found. Why does this always happen to me? ENTRY #19: I checked in one more time to see if my therapist had come back, and they gave me weird looks. What for? ENTRY #20: These people came over, they told me that I'm to be taken away soon. This is really dumb. I haven't even done anything! ENTRY #21: I'm tired of writing these confessions. They haven't even done anything to help me. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. I'm going to put them away in my room. I never want to see this notebook again. Never again. Never again. ENTRY #22: I felt some random urge to write again. It's been a week. Nothing much has happened. I'm being taken away tomorrow. Hopefully I can bring my book along. ENTRY #23: Somebody really annoyed me today. I decided to kick them, punch them, over and over. Over and over. Over and over. ENTRY #24: I can hear the people coming to the door, I'm being taken away now. When I come back I'll write. I promise. I promise. I promise. I promise Category:Mental Illness